May 2011
April 2011
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FAST FIVE WAS AWESOME
This movie surprised the hell out of me AND everyone else in the movie theater. I’ve seen all the other movies because my stupid cousins are fans so don’t judge me. This is the 5th fucking movie and it was amazing. Wow. Very good improvements, screenwriters!!
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I just wanna sew some hair on Prince Williams...
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Fuck the Royal Wedding
NO MORE STEVE CARELL ON THURSDAY NIGHTS :’((
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My professor spoke words that truly touched my...
“There will be no final for this course.”
Human CentiPad
Fucking disgusting. Still loved it tho.
Pres. Obama is officially releasing a copy of his...
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Ugh
So I still don’t have health insurance and I cant get a student loan yet BUT all people are worried about is a god damn BIRTH CERTIFICATE?
Stay classy, America..
Today is the last day of spring break and I did...
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I wonder if I'm the only one who sometimes forgets...
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If you give me a piece of paper telling me to 'Go...
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Annoying
The Windows Update reminder to restart your computer is like a little kid. You tell it that you’ll restart later, so it goes away, then it pops up again in two minutes and says “Ok, it’s later!”.
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The best newscasts are when politicians feud with rappers, and the news anchor has to quote a lyric like “gangsta bitches” in his uptight news voice.
If everyone had a dad like me, no one would have sex tapes.
– Tina Fey, Letterman 4/15/11
Yes, a sex tape. The height of depravity. Here’s a quick list of things that annoy me about Tina Fey (in no particular order):
1. Her regular allusions to a joyless and uninteresting sex life.
ep1.6
Jenna Maroney: How’s the sex?
Liz Lemon: Fast and only on...
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1st day of spring break and I'm so fucking bored...
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People on TV always give such accurate descriptions of criminals to sketch artists. I look at myself every chance I get and I don’t think I could get my own face right.
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Is there anything worse than pants that are too...
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Oh my god, shut the fuck up Michael Steele.
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I hate when I bite dead skin off my lip and I go from thinking, “I’m going to stop looking like a freak with dead lip-skin” to “Fuck - my lip is bleeding!”
HOW IN THE FUCK IS PRINCE 58 YEARS OLD?!
HE STILL LOOKS LIKE A 30 YEAR OLD.
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Why Benicio? Why? Why? YOU KNOW BETTER!!!
Always use a condom kids.